…”Oh let me just add”…

Many years ago I was invited to play in a Golf Outin’ down in the Centerville/Brent area of Alabama. It was bein’ held at a small, very nice little (Country) Country Club. I remember bein’ impressed by the golf course it’s self. It was very well maintained for not bein’ any larger than it was. I don’t remember exactly WHO was actually hostin’ it. But an ole friend of mine, “The Ole Tater Chip Salesman”, worked for a local Snack Food Company, who was one of the companies contributing to the Sponsorship of the days outin’. The Ole Tater Chip Salesman invited three of us (The Ole Insurance Rep, The Ole Army Depot Clerk, & I) that were all friends, to join him on a Team that his company was sponsorin’. It was a standard type “Best Ball” team format. For those of you who aren’t familiar with that term it’s that all four (4) members, per a team, each hit a shot on a given hole, & then they play the BEST SHOT (hit ball) of a Team member. Thus the term “Best Ball Format”. Even though there are four (4) actual shots available to a team, per Par Ratin’, per hole (x18 holes), there’s an awful lot of “Cheatin’ ” that takes place in these types of Golf Outin’. You pick the types of players (Dr’s, Lawyers, Judges, Salesmen, Mechanics, Land Barons, etc.). Anyone that tells you that their team played “Straight UP”, {{{{{ Cough, Cough – Bull $#!+ – Cough }}}}}, is just lyin’ to you! It’s a competition! People, I don’t care how honest they are, CHEATIN’, in these types of Golf Games, is common place. It’s just part of the fun of it. Then everyone enjoys a good meal together, as the awards/prizes that were donated are awarded. The Winners are determined by WHO CHEATED THE BEST (without gettin’ caught)! Then the days activities are over. It was a good day, good food & good fun. Now we headed home. On the way we were all reminiscin’ on the days events, had the radio cranked up, & three of us noticed the sound of {{{ “Snorin’ ” }}} comin’ from the Shot Gun Seat! The Ole Tater Chip Salesman, our host for the day, was sleepin’! It could have been from a number of things, the ride home, the borin’ company, playin’ in the hot sun that day, or TOO much COLD BEER on the Expense Account! Well, The Ole Army Depot Clerk got the idea for us “to have a little fun, at our host’s expense”. We decided to count down from three (3), {{{{{ SCREAM ! }}}}} at the tops of our lungs, & for me, the driver, SLAM ON THE BRAKES!. We knew we would be approachin’ a long straight away soon. There was a Loggin’ Truck in my rear view mirror. I let him pass me so we weren’t in any danger of hittin’ anyone or anyone hittin’ us. Then The Insurance Rep, of ALL people, started countin’ us down. 3 – 2 – 1 – {{{{{ SCREAM ! (x3) }}}}}, the sound of {{{{{ SCREECHING TIRES ! }}}}}, The Ole Tater Chip Salesman was slung forward, his Seat Belt Lock UP on him, &  he began to SCREAM LIKE A LITTLE GIRL! I mean {{{ Blood Curdlin’ Screamin’ }}} ! Not just once but several times over several seconds! But it seemed longer than that.Then he realized we were all laughin’ our asses off! It was funny! Damned Funny I must say, well at least to the three (3) of us! I had to pull over to keep from wreckin’ my car, from laughin’ so much & so hard! Needless to say The Ole Tater Chip Salesman didn’t think it was so damn funny. Oh well, sometimes, ya just have to find comedy & laughter where you can. And usually it’s at someone else’s expence! Oh let me just add, he didn’t fall back to sleep the rest of the way home!…”Hold’em Hook”!…..BG>

…”maybe ya just had to be there”…

There was a time, way back when, when we , our family, would every now & then go on a day trip to different places with another family. Friends of our. Our kids were just a couple of years apart. In each family there was a son & daughter. So the trips & days went well. On this particular day we were headed to Tallapoosa, GA. Our destination was for two stores right next door to each other. One was a Golf Supply Outlet & the other was a Year Round Christmas Store. Now, I’ll let y’all guess who was headed to which stores. The other family just happened to have a Mini Van & we all fit in it just fine. The bad thing was the other Father, he’s an “Ole Tater Chip Salesman”, would drive. I always questioned his “Man Hood” as he just looked too happy to be drivin’ a “Mini Van”! The highlight of the day happened as we were approachin’ downtown Tallapoosa, GA. It ain’t a real big town. We came in on GA Hwy #100, crossed over the ole Rail Road Tracks, turned on to US Hwy 78 & were slowly easin’ down main street. Now Tallapoosa, GA. is an OLD COUNTRY TOWN. The Ole side walks were elevated, had roofs extendin’ out over the ole sidewalks for shade & to keep the rain off of ya I guess. They were real narrow. With everything in such close proximity there, ya know, really made things reverberate underneath’em, pretty damn loud (remember that). Folks were leisurely  strollin’ along lookin’ as though they had no where to be in a hurry, as ole Country Folk do. As we eased along I noticed an Ole Dog, “Ole Blue” I called ’em, & he was just followin’ is nose along the side walk. Now “Ole Blue” was a TRIPOD! He was long legged, ribs was slightly showin’, he was just lopin’ along & had a pretty good gait goin’ too, for an Ole Tripod. I guess he was either sniffin’ out who all had been cruisin’ his territory as dogs do or he was sniffin’ for a tasty snack, dropped from some of the Saturday Strollers. Well I was ridin’ “Shotgun” & spotted “Ole Blue” bout a 1/2 a block in front of us. Well, I don’t know why it did but a strange hankerin’ was comin’ on me. The closer we got to “Ole Blue” the more excited I got. I kinda felt like a Cat, crouched down gettin’ ready to pounce. The only difference was my tail, cause I don’t have one, wasn’t twiitchin’ the closer we got to’em. There were conversations goin’ on inside the Mini Van so everyone was preoccupied & not payin’ any attention to me & they hadn’t seen “Ole Blue” yet. As I eased my window down, the attention shifted to me. A couple of folks was askin’, in unison, “why are you lettin’ the AC out”? The whole time I was easin’ my arm out the window, I sat up tall in my seat & {{{{{ WHAM! – WHAM! – WHAM!!! }}}}} I beat on the side of that Mini Van, scarin’ the hell out of everyone in it. The guy drivin’ didn’t know if he’d hit somethin’ or someone had hit him! At the same time I was doin’ my best imitation of a “BIG DOG” barkin’, {{{{{ Arrrr! – Arrrr! – Arrrr – Arrr!!! }}}}}. My Bride & my children figured it out pretty quick. They know me! The driver’s wife & kids were still tryin’ to figure out what their Dad/Her Husband had hit!. “Ole Blue” flung his head around, tucked his tail between his legs, as though there was a BIG Ole Dog about to take off part of his ass! He was tryin’ to get some traction to get the hell out of there. It was kinda like his clutch was slippin’! His ole long lanky legs were goin’ thru the motions but he just wasn’t gettin’ no where. Bout that time his ole paws caught traction, he flung his ole head back to the left & {{{{{ WHAM ! }}}}}. Right into the side of the buildin’, face first! {{{{{ Rrr – Rrr – Rrr – Rrr!!! }}}}} the whole time & down he went!. He finally got up, still just a hollerin’ {{{{{ Rrr – Rrr – Rrr – Rrr!!! }}}}} & took out around the corner & he never checked up!!! I laughed so hard my ribs & throat were hurtin’. Like a chain reaction, from the others in the “Mini Van”, all began to break out in laughter as well. Except for “Ole Tater Chip Salesman” he was still tryin’ to figure out what just happened to his “MiniVan”. I don’t know, maybe ya just had to be there. We didn’t buy anything that day but it was pretty entertain’ for me I must say…”Hold’em Hook”!…..BG>

…”doin’ somethin’ similar”…

Down at midnight last night, up at 6 a.m. this mornin’. Looks like it’s going to be one of those dark dreary rainy type days, at least that’s what the Weatherman is  tellin’ us AGAIN. My Bride & I are enjoying the morning sippin’ on our Mugs-O-Joe. I have my pot of “Dunkin Doughnuts Regular” & she has her Fru-Fru taste of the month, made one mug @ a time. Later today we’re goin’ to meet up with my son & his family. We’re going to have lunch with the Grands at a restaurant in The Ham @ The Summit. I was gettin’ ready to leave lunch a little early. MY middle Grand was cryin’, as I was huggin’ her & trllin’ her bye-bye, cause she didn’t want Papa to leave. I was headin’ to attend the Funeral Visitation of a friend, who Passed suddenly last Thursday. Just a few months ago she had finally reached the ripe ole age of “The Double Nickel”, still young by today’s standards. I didn’t stay too long, just long enough to see a couple old friends. I decided to drive up through the cemetery, as that’s where my Mother and Stepdad are buried. Thought I would visit they’re graves, it’s been awhile. There are visitors & there are avoiders. Let me just say “I’m NOT a good grave visitor”, shame on me for that I guess. Hey, it is what it is. You know that’s one of those places you stand head hangin’, looking down, & you’re not really talking out loud but YOU ARE havin’ a conversation. I didn’t really know if I asking for approval or was I asking for forgiveness? I didn’t really get any answers but did realized I was standin’ there, in a light sprinklin’ of rain, cryin’. It’s kind of a strange scenario I guess. But, I’m sure others have found themselves doin’ somethin’ similar. Oh well, I’m now back in The Big Pell in comfortable surroundin’s. Ya’ll have a good evenin’…”Hold’em Hook”!…..BG>

…”I feel safe in sayin’ “…

Just Chillin'Yesterday was a dreary lookin’ day, most of the day.  Early in the mornin I headed to The Ham to get my Brides car serviced. Just routine servicin’. On my way back, to The Big Pell, I stopped in, unannounced as I usually do, on some Ole Friends I used to work with. I just missed one as he had an appointment to keep but I did get to visit with his office manager. She was sharin’ with me the recent loss of a Grandchild just a few months old. Very touchin’ story. I didn’t stay too long as she was the only one there runnin’ the business. I headed on home & got there just in time for lunch & spent some time with my Bride & daughter before headin’ back to The Ham for my BHS monthly evenin’ get together. The rain’ finally made it & made things sort of hazardous as folks just refuse to slow down on their way home. Me First-Me First! “Damn The Torpedoes, Full Speed Ahead”! Before ya know it there’s metal crunckin’ & glass shatterin’ along the route. I had a feelin’ there weren’t goin’ to be many folks show up @ The Village Tavern (VT). Vacation time, weather, & work schedules always affect the out turn. There were only Four (4) BHS folks & One (1) WHS friend made it. Later there were two (2) more BHS folks joined us briefly. They had been there @ The VT for other reasons but it was great to see’em. As time ticked around to 8:00pm it was once again time to head our separate ways. I got home & was settlin’ in. I got on the computer & noticed a FB Post under the name of “Susan Thompson Wright“, BHS Class of 1979, I knew Susan had been plannin’ on meetin’ with us earlier this evenin’. Her daughter had posted that her Mom, Susan, has passed away earlier in the day. Susan was one who attended our BHS get together quite often. It was a shock to hear of her passin’. My heart kinda sunk. Again, I have to say, we just don’t get to see old friends often enough. Susan will be missed by us all. I feel safe in sayin’ our most Sincere Condolences go out to Susan’s Family & Loved ones…Hold’em Hook”!…..BG>

…”I might even troll a line”…

My Bride & daughter met up with another Mother & Daughter & are on a “Mother Daughter Beach Week” get away. They left this mornin’, met up with the others along the way, & are now in Destin, FL along the Gulf Coast just chillin’. They also met up with an Ole Friend of ours tonight & probably are “Sippin’ Wine & Tellin’ Fairy Lies” about folks. My son & his family are at “Mouse World”. As for me, I ran some errands today. One turned out to be just a “Wild Goose Chase” into The Ham. But this evenin’ I’m here all by my lonesome. It’s amazin’ just how quiet this ole house is when it’s just me here. I have taken some time this evenin’ to check on & readin’ up about several friends that are experiencin’ issues in their lives. Makes me realize how fortunate I am. As I always said “God takes care of Babies & Fools”! Well, I ain’t no Baby. As for tomorrow I plan on gettin’ out on the water & just cruise along. No where to go & a long time to get there! Hell, I might even troll a line out behind the Pontoon Boat. Oh how I do love bein’ on the water. Night night to all…”Hold’em Hook”!…..BG>

…””HAPPY FATHERS DAY”…

Out on The Deck 5-26-16Today is “Fathers Day”! To all of you FATHERS “HAPPY FATHERS DAY”! To both of my Fathers, Charles W. Gray (1953 R.I.P.) & my Step-Father Claude C. McGraw (2002 R.I.P.), I thank them for, both, the rolls they played in my life. My Father (Charles) passed away, in an accident, when I was only 20 months old. I really never knew him. I would also like to thank all of those “Neighbor Hood Fathers” who shared their time & leadership with me in my early years. To THEIR children thank you for sharing them with me, it meant more than you’ll ever know. To those of you who have lost your Fathers cherish your time & memories with them. To those of you who are lucky enough to still have your Fathers make sure you recognize them today. The day will come when you’ll wish you had. If you can’t be with them today CALL them, it’ll mean an awful lot. Folks of my age & older care NOTHING about getting a TEXT. DON”T DO IT!. Those are for you younger folks. As for Me, I’m blessed to have my Children & Grandchildren with me…”Hold’em Hook”…..BG>

…”all of us as a Family”…

MY Bride & I arrived back home last night safe, sound, & worn out. We spent the last week out in the Ft Worth, TX area with her sister & family (husband, daughter) @ their house. It wasn’t a “Vacation Trip” either. It was one of those “Family Get Togethers” about evaluating a elderly family member (NO not me, not-yet anyway) & their ability to live alone. MY Bride & Sister-in-Laws Widowed Mother is 89 years Old & currently lives by herself in Ohio. There are NO family members within a 11 hr drive or more. She is currently visitin’ with them as well. The days drug on as the Adult Children, family members, were observing daily activities, physical abilities, & conversation to evaluate memory skills, etc. of Mom. Fortunately she has not suffered any major health issues but she is startin’ to slip. And it is a slippery slope! There have been & are increasin’ “tale tale signs”. To openly discuss Assisted Livin’, givin’ up her Car, movin’ closer to or movin’ in with one of her two children (daughters), meets with a lot of resistance. I understand NO ONE wants to give up their Independence/Freedom and have to rely on someone else for most all of your/their needs. But, if we live long enough it usually takes folks in that direction. For those of you lucky enough to still have your parents livin’ it is not easy to go through. Love them all you can! My family has already lived through it & it takes a toll on all involved. But, they are Our/Your Parents & that is just what we do. No firm decisions were made but hopefully we, the family, will be able to convince my Mother-in-Law what will be best for Her & Her Family. She will be with my Sister-in-Law & her family for a few more days. So we’ll see how things go from there. While in the Ft Worth, TX area, I was fortunate to be able to separate myself from those issues to MEET & have lunch with a “FB Friend” who broke away from work for a short time. We shared only an hour together but it was enjoyable finally meetin’ & gettin’ to know him. I look forward to doin’ it again my next trip out, hopefully under better conditions. Also my Bride & I were able to breakaway, on another day, to meet an Ole Friend from our Germany days for lunch. It’s amazin’ how much you can share & catch up on in such a short period of time. I have other friends in that area but time was limited for OUR time. I hope & pray that all our efforts, as a Family, have a positive result for my Mother-in-Law. Because what ever the outcome of this “Family Get Together” is it will eventually effect all of us as a Family…Hold’em Hook”!…..BG>